Posts Tagged ‘philip galanes’

Quote of the day: AL-ANON

July 25, 2017


I once heard a member of Al-Anon, a world-wide group for the family and friends of alcoholics, boil it down like so: “I didn’t cause my mother’s drinking problem; I can’t control it; and I can’t cure it.” But by focusing on our own behavior and feelings – instead of the alcoholic’s, for a change – we may find a healthy path forward. Just walking into an Al-Anon meeting helps break down the secrecy and shame that so often surround addiction. You are not alone. You may not change the alcoholic, but you can certainly improve the way you deal with him.

–Philip Galanes, New York Times “Social Q’s” columnist

Quote of the day: GAYDAR

July 16, 2017


I have a friend whose 15-year-old son seems gay to me. He doesn’t date, and my gaydar is usually on target. I hate to meddle. But this friend also has a habit of saying derogatory things about gay people, often under cover of her religious beliefs. Can I tell her about her son? It may stop her hurtful behavior.BEV

Proceed directly to the nearest phone and dial 1-800-BE-QUIET. I know you mean well. But speculating about anyone’s sexuality, particularly a child’s, can be dangerous and is none of your business. In other breaking news, great gaydar is nothing to brag about; it only means that you’re often a busybody. Of course, none of this stops you from calling out the mother on her homophobic statements. Say, “I don’t agree with you, and I’d prefer not to hear any more of it.” No need to implicate the son to stand up for human decency.

–Philip Galanes, “Social Q’s,” New York Times

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